Friday, November 13, 2009

Train of ThoughtS



So many things moving around in my head, yet I am not writing for quiet a long time. Because I was not in the mood for writing, I was actually busy doing one of my most favourite thing...simply being lazy. Everyday I thought of writing, yet I didn't feel like typing .
I felt like talking with people. But unfortunately (or may be fortunately) there's none around  with enough patience to listen to my whole range gripes and tripes.
Here in blog at least I can express my words and some nice people reads my blogs and praise my writings, which I never thought, could happen.

Just a few days back(when I was in my lazy phase) I read a book We The Living  by Ayn Rand. Loved it , loved it very much. Its about post effect of revolution in Russia, but it was a very romantic one. But the thing is that , the book has infused a typical anti-communist mentality in my head. Now I hate communism(well its not like that, that I was a huge patron of communism before reading the book; I just developed a sort of hatred towards communism after reading the book). Well, on this topic I remember one thing, I have got very much influenced by various people and books many times in my life.
Ayn Rand in her writing presents her own convictions, which are , not a bit, but quiet a much deviated from normal thoughts.
Communism is the ideology , where there will be no classes in the society, there will be no distinction between a worker or a manager and everyone will be the owner of every organisation , with everyone working as much as they can, but will be earning on the basis of what they need, Not what they deserve.
I don't think this thing to be a bit practical. Its not possible to work as much as one can, most of the times, and again its a sort of injustice to give one what he needs, not what he deserves. All human beings are not equal, everyone's intelligence or physical strength is not equal, everyone's ambition is not equal. Communism is a barrier for the outstanding; if he wants to do , own something then it will not be his' but all's. Is it possible? Is it acceptable?
So, stratas in society is quiet obvious.
I do agree , capitalistic society is most often excruciating for the subordinates, since the owner desires the maximum possible benefits,but I don't think communism is the solution The one who is working hard and the one not doing so can never own equal possessions.
Why on earth do we live for?For whose sake? Ourselves. Living is self-reverence.
So, I don't understand the ideology of not doing what one wishes to,and of not getting the full one deserves.

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Another thought was moving around, in my head....escapism and hedonism.
Well, I think I am a hedonist, I do most of the things for myself, for my happiness. I try to live my life keeping myself happy. For being happy it is often required to be a escapist. Don't you agree ?
Interaction with someone makes you sad? Do you prefer to say you, an escapist when you avoid that person? May be yes, but I don't see anthing bad in it, cause its done just for self. May be often its termed selfishness. Well, aren't we really meant to be so? We have only one life (that's even predicted to end on 2012...:(.. hehe.) so we should live on our terms and for our goodnesses and joys. Also there's a controversy regarding this, in my head. If someone gets joy always doing harm to the others, then what will happen to others.?! Well, I really don't think anyone can get true joy by doing intentional harm to others.

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Now , a poem, that was in mind for a time, but today the Bryan Adam's songs instigated me to write it.

You loved me, you said you do so.
I was in love,
Enough, enough to be blind in that.
Now I often think,
What you did.!
You loved me, or Always just
Wanted me to love you?!

I am not blaming you,
Not a bit,
I don't even dare to do so.
I just still love you
As it was years back,
I will love you
As it was years back.

I walk the life
With my shadow
But I am not alone
The memories I still cherish.
I don't need others' love,
I now hate those
Who Claim they love Me..!!
I prefer to be alone.

I am alone, not lonely,
I am alone, by choice,
Not by Chance.

I still love you,
The only difference is
I want you nomore.
I need you nomore.
I see you nomore.


                        
                                                   
                                                        **************************


Ahhh, I am feeling so light after saying(oops writing!) soo much..:)

22 comments:

Anoop said...

nice poem...

did u dump any1??? :O :P

khe khe khe... ;)

chocolate lover said...

:))))..
hEY YOU DIDN'T WISHED ME ON MY BIRTHDAY ;P

Meow said...

Good! that you feel relieved :)

Rohit Dassani said...

Hey u have been tagged!!!

AJai said...

i think the nothingness fever is infecting you too. :P

Mahesh Sindbandge said...

Hmmm Writer's block does happen regularly to me too but we cant help it sometimes..

I was going thru one last month :) Now, as u wrote so much, i think u r out of it.

We the living? i never heard of it. But i heard a lot about ayn rand. One another book by her is atlas shrugged, right? she writes almost 700+ pages in every book. Now where should i buy that much patience form? Communism..i dont like it in the first place and now as you say all this. I feel its too bad to be a part of it.


Nothing wrong in being escapist unless and until you meant it to hurt someone.Well, it neither hurts you nor any other. You are just trying to avoid sadness, isn't?

Wow..It happens with me too..I get inspired by songs and write poems most of the times..

This one is truly a gem of a poem :) Poem is making me think too much but i have never been in that state ever. Donno what does it take to be like that. This poem is meant for big gals and big boys :)

Keep writing :)

An Ordinary Gal said...

loved the post especially poem :)

Jai said...

Just chanced upon yur blog. Trust me, I loved that poem. Truly amazing and very honest. :)
hv fun take care. god bless you

prerana said...

beautiful poem..
I guess its easy to relate t something like that, because everyone has love that they've given but never got back!

Love your writing!

Atulya said...

Really nice post.. n the poem is superb...

"You loved me, or Always just
Wanted me to love you?"

truly touching n hurting as well...

Vittaldas Prabhu said...

Nice details and I like the thought process that has gone into writing this. You really thought out the various aspects of human values, survival and triumph (if I may say so). Finally, the poem is touching. Please do visit me sometime, I have a new post at my blog.

Jason said...

This is my first visit, but I'm very impressed with your blog. I have a blog myself that provides inspiration and guidance to millions of people around the world. I was wondering if we could do a link exchange to spread some traffic around. Let me know if this is cool.

Jason
TheWISDOMWALL.com

Ashish said...

To start (this would be a long comment)

Nothing can be 0% or 100%, everything is in between.

Happiness, sorrow, content, respect, money, .....

That communist thinking is too much outdated and not-so-local thinking.

Speaking about hedonism and escapism...

I have always skipped between these two or rather I should say I'm 40% escapist and 60% hedonist. As a matter of fact my blog title says, "Exploring the Hedonism of Life" ;)

See I came to this blog to look for some "lazy-time pass" but it had good gyan too :P

Communism, escapism, hedonism...

Ayn Rand... how do you find her writings?

I've heard a lot about her but still haven't yet read any of her philosophical works (as wikipedia says :P)

and BTW if she writes romantic fiction, she has got another reader!

but I guess it's like a drop in ocean rather (1/1000th) of a drop in 1000 oceans together ;)

Liked your post! (of course this is a cliche )



Have a nice day



Ashish Gourav
http://iitashish.blogspot.com/

sulagna chatterjee said...

heyii rimz:) thanks for dropping by and the lovely comment :)

and the poem is soo..me..really

Swapna Raghu Sanand said...

Take it as a challenge to get out of the lazy mode and be daring enough to push the boundaries for yourself. Be like a butterfly, don't chain yourself to a cycle but go beyond to explore and discover the world.

Romance seems to seep between the lines of your post. Let it go when it needs to because romance never dies, even when relationships do.

HaRy!! said...

nice poem...esp the part.." you loved me or..." came to know yu thru webneetech.com..cya around

rimz said...

@Anoop:
I did dump (but not)1...:P...
hehe...

@choco lover:
ya i was late wishing dearie...:)

@meow:
ya its indeed good...:)

rimz said...

@Rohit:
yeha hve done it.:)

@AJai:
U r very right.
it infected me long ago, in fact..:P

@Mahesh:
actually fr me i fel lazy to write..:P...
aftr writing i was indeed feeling better.:)
Ayn rand...yeah they are long but obviously worth d time, they take..:) Atlas shrugged , fountainhead , we d living are some of her bst works...

and d poem, dnt praise it so much, i'll fell shy..:D

rimz said...

@ordinary gal:
thanku sweetie...

@jai:
hi.. thanku. m happy dt u liked my blog. kip coming..:)

@prerana:
thanku.. ya u r right, dat always happen in love...:(

rimz said...

@Atulya:
thanku soo much...

@vittal:
yeah its things frm my day to day life n views abt life... liked ur blog will b chking. kip writing..:)

@wisdom:
thanku, will visit u sometimes soon..:)

rimz said...

@ashish:
well dts a log post indeed. n love long comments(dis is not cliche).
well d communist thought may be clche fr d society , but not for me. I nevr found any interest in ol dis stuffs, but aftr reading we d linving formed an idea abt communism, n d way she presented d book, communism is obviously to be looked down upon.
Nd as far Ayan rand is considered, yeah she so writes vry passionately romantic novels.I read her 3 works by now-The fountainhead,Atlas Shrugged and We the living and I personally liked them all.

@sulagna:
thanku ..:)

@swapna:
thanku very much for ur advice. i'll keep it in my mind..:)

@Harry:
ohh ya..thanku..kip coming..:)

nesquarx said...

You're welcome.:) I think it's great when somebody reads Ayn Rand and tries to say something about it. That reflects a lot of the person.

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