Monday, June 30, 2008

Unsolvable BIAS...

I, rather all of us have thought on this topic, m gonna discuss now ;at a time or the other. May be under the pressure of circumstance or just like that. But am sure all have thought on the topic:

WHO is BETTER ??? MAN or WOMAN????

Well , I will make an attempt to discuss the topic , at the end may not be able to draw a proper conclusion, or may be proper conclusion is not possilble on dis topic.

I studied in a famous CO-EDucation school upto class X. And had huge number of 'friends' who were 'Boys'. As in our school the number of boys far surpasses the number of gals.
In my home too, my parents are quiet very broad minded and liberal. They never scolded me or gave me red eye due to the phone calls of the boys, their visit to my place or the reverse.
They always , rather most of the time had kept n still(this word 'still' is of quiet importance, to which i'll come in due course)keeps full faith on me , as they have always well taught me , evrything has its' limits, which is better not to be crossed.
At clss VIII , in our cls we had some 10 gals in a section of 45 students, but the ratio further decreased in cls X , due to further division of sections(dis was done for givin more attention to the students....!!!!!) .Ok, den we had 4 girls out of 34 students in our section.
I never had any problem with guys, and m not at all shy to say i liked the boys' company more for their mentality, AT THAT TIME. May be coz, at that time i was tomboyish to some extent n was only concerned about my studies n all , n nevr pay heed to what others used to say.
Nways, still now I give a damn to what others think about me.
I always competed with the boys, nd beated most of them(well, in academics n stuffs related to academics only, m too bad in games n sports....!!!).My joy lied in dat.
May be in my subconscious i used to be gleeful at the fact of defeating the so-called superior sex.
But My fate nevr gives me a long lastin joy:(, as i hve already said in my last blog..)

I donno, its' still my life's biggest curiosity: how i did soooo verry bad in my board exam, that changed ,rather according to me spoiled rest of my life.I expected something around 87%-88%.But ended in gettin a staggering 80%.
I broke down like hell. All dose whom i always used to beat, not only those, ppl who used to stay far behind me, beated me.i was shattered.Ppl say wen u get a shock, u gain the potential to do bettr.Well, dat never happens with me :( :( :(
However, to others it(the result) was "not bad",to some it was "not upto the mark", some said" u should have done better".....
ppl's dis dialogues r jst too annoyin n irritatin to me, i jst cant take dem...

Nways my result was enuf to get admission in a so-called 'good' nd'reputated' school.
I took admission in a school.The school is a girls' only school.
I had tremendous trouble in adjustin truely, n in two yrs of my +2 i hardly did adjust.
It was too suffocating for me with gals alaround.Ppl used to rather still will bend deir lips hearin or reading dis.
All the girls seemed so sick to me,man..ufffff....
They n deir typical girlie nakhras, their Sydney Scheildons, their 'boyfrnds', the movies, their dressing sense~~ ohh god they used to come to school with make ups(kajals n lipsticks).
I often felt likin slappin hard a few of dem.nways i nevr did so ..hehehe...
nways i always had some sort of probs wid someone or the other.
i hated goin to school.Only one was dere i liked , still my besto frndie sagnika, she was a real sweetheart.
Nways dat way i started realisng ~ how mean , how cheap, how SELFISH,How satanic, how stupid, how damn idiotic n how bitchy girls can be...n may learned some of dose characters to some extent tooo, hehe, dnt get afraid.
I still get annoyed remebering those days.
There are several bitter incidents with the gals, which i dnt wanna discuss, rather evn remember.
Well, on dis context i shud say aftr takin admission in this girls' school only i came to kno about the concept of "L * S * O" and "G * Y".B4 dat i had no idea abt how can two guys or two boys like each other "dat way"......
As i already spoiled my life in frustration of Xth std board exam, it was pretty hard for me to come out with flyin colors in XIIth.I did a so so result(just 70%), which my parents said was quiet very fine, aftr what i did in my two years.Well, its worth mention in dis two yrs i dint have much contact wid my old school pals or much boys, except a few tuition ones...
After quiet a lot of turmoil and a number of Entrances another Dream of mine shattered..
I dreamt of Becomin a doctor ONCE UPON A TIME.(I got a rank though, may be which would have made me eligible for becomin an ayurveda or Unani doc..Well, i was no way interested in dat, and none includin me was ready fr takin another yr prep fr d medical)
And always wished ki , i dnt bcome an engineer.But it was my fate.
Aftr lot of the turmoil I went for councelling for ENGINEERING, and chose MECHANICAL ENGINEERING.
Well, still now it was the best option for me den, dat moment.
I took admission.

1st day of college.7th August 'o6: I went to colg n went to my room n took a seat.
Aftr quiet a time teacher came with attendance sheet.He bagan to call our names.
Roll call was complete.
To evryone n evn to the teacher's utter surprise it was discovered i was the only GIRL out of the 66 students of the 1st yr, Mechanical department.
Now , another story begins.
It's almost like a boys' dept, m only being sitted like a doll uprite dere.
Well, i never felt like dat sick as i used to feel amongst those GIRLS.
I will never deny in my life uptill now , Boys can be ur best frnds.
They really help a lot, wenver one needs.
This may be visible in a thronged bus in afternoon or may be any time , where children droops with heavy school bags, nd Ladies takes deir mid-day nap nd boldly regret holdin those bags even.gents definitely takes the bags n often let others sit.
Women around world are shouting"MEN AND WOMEN ARE EQUAL".
Den y da hell are we again shouting for "RESERVATION"..?????!!!!!
This proves women are not enough Confident about themselves nd their potential.
Wel, i my self m not confident n always remain confused n dwindle between options..:( :(
I do agree, exceptions are there.

C d guys, I really endy dem,How boldly dey can cheat in sem n evn internals..:P...i cant still now, after spendin 2 yrs in a dept of boys.
Howevr, we shout we hardly can beat dem in dese matters~well its my viewpoint.Other scools of thought are always welcome.

I am a girl.
So, now lets come to the BADS OF MEN.:) :)
Most of them are insensible,adament, arrogant(not all),(TOOOOOOOOOO) impatient and lacks sense of situations(means where exactly to say wat), thinks them overcool ,oversmart, overconfident and have n irritaing habit of knowing "EVERYTHING" or "NOTHING" on earth.
watevr u say ,u can quiet expect a "ha ami jani to " frm dem, or sometime evn annoying " ami to kichu e bujhte parchi na..!!.".They are always extremist~~ RED ya BLUE, nevr VIOLET evn for the sake of pleasin others.Ohhh ..Gawd...
I m pissed of by these characteristics of MEN.

MY BELOVED DAD: I do respect him and love him alot as my dad.I respect his moralities nd principals.But he never in his lyf tried to understand my mom~ thats where my grief lies.
He is too short tempered n aftr a hectic wen comes bak come, hardly anyone of us dare to face n talk to him properly.

MY SCHOOL, COLLEGE FRIENDS(boys): Well, they are like my oxygen.After colg m agn in well touch wid my old school pals due to my dear dear Moble.
But i really often dnt get dem. Why dey use so much of slangs, man
?????????????????~~ many of whose meaning are also unknown to dem evn.n spare me, it seems i hear new ones daily....

But they use those whether to call someone, in joy , in anger ,in frustration or in grief.By colg tym dose "asterisked " words are indispensible part of their souls...
I just hate it.

MY BROTHER:Perahaps he is a bit young for bringing under dis bias, for he is in VIII only.
But he do have the typical male characters profoundly in him, like dominating others n such.

MY LOVE: I used to love(still love),rather liked someone frm cls VII, widout any knowledge of him.But wen there was 'almost' no more hope n 7 yrs passed widout any sort of any contact,suddenly thru a social site i found him out.It deserves special mention, it was not an accident ,i intentionally n after much labour found him out frm the crowd.
well, He recognised me n gave his no. in his own will in 2nd chat onlyby himslf(I NEVR DID ASK FOR DAT)..!!!
wat next?????
well, perhaps u can guess , perhaps u not.
He proposed me widin 2 mnths, n obviously it was accepted frm my side.
He was,rather is n will be the only spcl onein my life ,but He had an Ex gf(Oooops, sorrry 1st love),whom he left .....Y??
Lack of patience.....[due to some reason communication gap took place but the girl nevr declared ki she dint love him]
Well, well ,well......i heard those, suffered frm acute insecurity complex(dats agn too typical of a girl rite?????), but he made me belif he wil nevr leave watevr happens.
I had the nicest moments of my life wid him.
but also the most fiery ,tearful n saddest days came for this relation.....Y?????
It Broke , rather we separated mutually, for avoiding BITTERNESS(But who on earth can avoid dat...!!!!!)
I take 99% of the charge on me for the break up.I strted feelin i m not suitable or responsible enuf to b in a relation, serious enuf like dat.
BUT 1%, wat about dat?????
Obviously his impatience....
Aftr our break his ex(oooops agn am sorry, His 1st love) is back as FRIEND only in his life, for whom n whose friends(4) he spends for movie tickets worth 180 bucks each...!!!!!

He now says he is "CONFUSED".
[ N.B: Not much questions n enquieries from this part will be welcome.].

SOME 'not-so' IMPORTANT GUYS: Well, these comprise those few guys ,who claim they know me very well, and can understand me very well (i dnt biliv dem though, as it is not at ol possible to understand someone fully) and are able to tackle the PSYCHO like me.
They say boldly n keep on saying they l#v# me...
But a bit of my curiosity ,about one them ,showed that he say that words of LoVe to quiet a number of girls....
[If i were not an engg. student , perhaps i wud become a detective].
When i said this to him(i m a very straightforward person) he said he just showed his "cOOlness" to those "babes".......wat to say??!!! i donno...
Now, this person is a bit angry on me me dese days , as i made him fall under d 'not-so' important category.Wel, onething........i liked dis guy quiet a much once upon a time , but aftr his other faces came out.........I donno wat 'exactly' i feel for or about hum...!!! He denies those n i agn have to become the incorrigibly confused gal n inept for dis earth.....
Another one is an online frnd who is diein to meet me, n has fallen in tremendous lOve wid me, widout seeing and knowin me.Wen i asked this guy "tum kab sudhroge???"...
His gallant reply "Kya tum kavi sudhar paoge???" .....
Well, impressive answer though ,i hate the concept of fallin in love wid online frnds, whom u hardly kno, hvnt seen or met evr..

cant continue any more now ,uffffff......
comments n post are always welcome.n i hope to add a few more topics to dis topic in next few days.
Its already too big, n it may elongate more, ...cant help , the topic is only like dat n my thoughts are nevr endin...!!!!!!

gimme a diadem for writing such a long blog......


acidVox said...

men and women each have a specific role in life and society , though he barriers are being shatterd as we speak.
its basically wat we ourselves feel thats important...
as u said love life niye prosno korbo na , but in my opinion when a relation will break 50 % share is on either side. even if u feel u r 99% blame... its not true.
and u , being a girl can say " how SELFISH,How satanic, how stupid, how damn idiotic n how bitchy girls can be." ...this is commendable to say the least.
jaai hok .. trying to understand ppl is gr8 , but trying too fast is not. atleast i feel dat.

rimz said...

well, the saddest part of story is i nevr undrstand HUMAN BEINGS,their mentalities n all, irrespective of their sex n age.
So hve left dat long ago.

acidVox said...

keep interacting wid me ... ill show u how u can literally dissect peoples characters and understand what is inside their brains

rimz said...

but i think i m too dumb to be able to do dat.
nwys thanx.
i'll b in touch wid ya.

Weltmeister said...

'Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship."
So said Oscar Wilde....

Of course, every rule has an exception, and you seem to be a stubborn one. But how much longer can you delay the inevitable?

acidVox said...

just because oscar wilde said so doesnt make me agree to that comment. if u cant reason in your own mind and just blindly believe some comment by some other person , its difficult to say what u actually believe in ... the idea itself or the person whose comment u put forth

Anonymous said...

"its difficult to say what u actually believe in ... the idea itself or the person whose comment u put forth"

a dear frnd of u commented lyk dat n askd to keep in touch wid him by which he can 'SHOW" u "how to DISSECT" human mind""

wid his kind information no person on our beautiful planet can "dissect" someone's mind because it is IMPOSSIBLE........nd above ol NON-HUMANITERIAN.

some grt people lyk Sigmund Froyd tried a bit to picturise people's dream,but he failed....

so i believe in one thing,live beautifully wid wot is beautiful...dunt focus on wot is black spot.......we r ol ready to find wot is bad goin on around us.....

lets c wot is good among people not doin dissection of mind.....i dunt think ur LEARNED frnd can do dat........c d beautiful of lyf n u can draw d most beautiful of lyf.......

rimz said...

@ anonymous..
thnx for ur comment. i think u r rite, smehw.


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